The Iris Fund, Honoring the Life and Legacy of My Niece
I went to Target. I don’t remember what for exactly. I just knew deep in my guts that I would be heading out east soon and I needed to make sure the kids had what they needed so our nanny didn’t have to run errands with all three of them.
About two hours before this I had received a text message from my parents that they were headed into the city as my sister, who had been in the hospital for her second pregnancy, was rushed into emergency surgery to have her baby. I knew nothing else.
As I walked through Target I had this awful feeling that something wasn’t right. Shouldn’t we have heard by now how everyone was doing? How long does it take to have a c-section? I literally had no idea. In the midst of those thoughts the something isn’t right feeling got a lot more intense. And then I thought about the baby, what if she isn’t okay? Oh my goodness, I hope she’s okay! Wait, what about B? (That’s what we call my sis.) Oh God, please, don’t take our girls.
And then my phone rang and it was my dad. My dad never calls me. His voice was shaky. My dad’s voice is never shaky. I sat down on one of those metal shelves in the gift bag aisle. And he told me. B was okay, but Iris didn’t make it.
Wait. What? We had a healthy baby girl. What the heck just happened? Does B know yet? How is B? Oh my goodness. How is mom? How is Jose? Dad, how are you? All these questions raged in my head. I don’t think many of them came out of my mouth though. But truthfully, I can’t fully remember.
I do remember leaving my basket in that aisle and walking out the doors to go home. I remember feeling confused, devastated, overwhelmed with the unknown of what had just happened, and anger that I wasn’t out east to be with my parents and sister.
That was the day that Iris, my niece, went to Heaven before I ever got to meet her. There is more to my personal journey through such a devastating loss, but it’s not just my story and some parts are still a bit too tender to share just yet. Some things take time.
As I journey forward, her life is what compels me to help raise awareness and funds for the life-saving research that all families deserve.
There are many things in this life we cannot control. And often, we are simply at the mercy of events unfolding. However, I believe that God gives each of us gifts and talents to use in life-giving ways. Some of us are the actual doers and others of us are the supporters and cheerleaders.
Dr. Joy Vink and Dr. Kristen Meyers are the doers we have the privilege of supporting to ensure more families don’t have to experience what we have. Through their research we will find out what causes labor in a healthy pregnancy [side note: in this modern era we still don’t know what triggers labor, totally shocking since women have been having babies since, well, forever.] By doing so, they can help:
Preterm birth families with improved outcomes,
Reduce the number of c-sections needed for women who are not going into labor on their own,
Reduce the number of second trimester miscarriages,
And, reduce stress for full-term families because they will have better understanding of what to expect.
You can read more specifics about the research they are doing here.
This November, in support of this research, I am running the New York City Marathon with my family and some friends to raise money and awareness of this issue that is near and dear to us.
Please join us by making a donation here. Together, we can help ensure more families don’t have to go through what we have and that Iris’ legacy makes an everlasting mark!
You can learn more about the fund and research at www.theirisfund.org. All donations are tax deductible.
Thank you for your support!
